How’s your life happiness? On a scale of 1-10, 10 being extremely happy, how would you rate your happiness? Happiness for some seems to be random, occurring as a result of what we have or don’t have. Happiness can seem to be a fleeting feeling, something that passes quickly when we’ve fulfilled a goal or accomplishment. Often we think of happiness as something that happens to us, seemingly at random, or we are happy when we get what we want, and unhappy when we don’t get what we want.

We all have ups and downs in life. But rather than letting our happiness be at random or dependent on what we do or don’t have, happiness is also a choice. Here’s my top 7 tips for greater life happiness, allowing it to be more predictable in your life, and allowing you to have more control over your happiness.

1.Accept where you are now. Whatever is going on in your life, its okay to be where you are in your life now, recognize that you are learning important lessons that you can grow from. Let the lessons grow who you are rather than caving into feeling defeated. And, recognize that even if you are in a difficult place, life will change – whether 3 months, 6 months or a year from now, you will be in a different place. Ask yourself, “What am I learning in this situation?” Even when life is tough, we can focus on the positive things that we are learning, and be thankful for the positive lessons.

2.Take Care of your Feelings: There are so many things in our culture that are ready to distract us from the negative emotions that we feel. Whether its television, food, chocolate, wine, movies, there are always things that seem more fun than listening to what we feel. Take some quiet time in your day to pay attention to what you are feeling. Recognize that emotions are only messengers, and the emotions will pass if you notice them and recognize them for their message. Ask, “What is this feeling telling me?” and then breathe into the center of the emotion and it will fade. I offer some NLP tools for transforming negative emotions in my book, Lighten Up Train your Brain to Lose Weight, or you can find them in my blog.

3. Keep a Smile List – Think of all the things that make you smile, things you are grateful for, things that give you warm fuzzies. Keep it in a place that you can review daily. Smiling releases serotonin in the brain, the “feel- good” neurotransmitter. Smiling engages our brain to think of positive thoughts and memories, and when we are smiling, its more difficult to think of negative thoughts. Smiling also has health benefits like boosting the immune system and lowering blood pressure.

4. Be Social – Talking with friends or family members and engaging in social activity causes improved mental states, plus there’s the smile factor. We are more likely to smile while talking with others. Smiling is contagious, when we smile, others smile in response to us, and thus we smile even more. Being social has been found to boost our immune system as well.

5.Physical Exercise: Any physical exercise that engages the opposite sides of the body can help rebalance the hemispheres of your brain. Whether walking, biking or playing sports, physical activity can also work to release endorphins, the feel good brain chemicals. Some studies have actually found that cases of depression and anxiety cleared up with regular exercise.

6.Focus on What you Want. As a life coach, I often ask my clients about what they want. Typically, before I hear about what they do want, I hear a laundry list of all the negative things they don’t want. We get what we focus on, if we are focused on what we don’t want and the negatives in our life, then not only is our mood dour, but we are giving our unconscious mind directions to focus more on the negatives, and so our brain radar is tuned into more of the negatives, and so that is what we experience is more negatives. If however, we stay focused on what we want, we are tuning our brain into the positives, and so we experience more of the positives.

7.Get Help to Rewire the Negatives: Sometimes there is a part of our mind that gets stuck on a negative perspective. For example, this last week, I worked with a client who still carried feelings of loss from his divorce. As he thought about what he wanted in the future, he felt depressed, because this part of his mind was thinking, “what if I lose everything I’ve worked for again?” After we helped rewire that negative pattern, his mood shifted and he was better able to imagine creating the positive things he wanted for himself. When a part of your mind is wired into a negative thought pattern, it can be really difficult to shift it on your own. If you’ve experienced recurring negative thoughts or feelings, excessive worry or stress, you might want to try a “brain training” session. Try a Starter Strategy Session, only $25, See details here: http://www.expandingpotentials.net/lifecoaching.html

Here’s to your Health, Happiness and Success!

Holly Stokes, The Brain Trainer
I help you get more of what you want out life! Life Coaching gives you clarity in your life direction, purpose and goals. Brain Training rewires negative mental habits and patterns. Set up your mind with positive new mental strategies: greater focus, accomplishment, boost motivation and confidence and even eliminate self sabotage. Life Happiness * Weight Loss and Health * Love and Relationships * Business Focus